Friday, April 01, 2005

Today’s news

Today the European Union abolished the restrictions on immigration from outside of the Union, from now on only criminals and terrorists will be denied entry.

Today, the United States of America abolished the death penalty, disbanded the detention centre in Guantanamo, dismantled the protection fence towards Mexico and, to Huntington’s horror, recognized Spanish as the second official language.

Today Turkey, Bulgaria, Romania, countries of the Western Balkans, North Africa, Middle East and ex-Soviet Union entered the EU and the Union proclaimed an ongoing commitment to further enlargement, until the “Confederation Earth”.

Today the United States of America and the Russian Federation applied for the EU membership.

Today Tobin tax got accepted by the entire international community and UN member states collectively agreed to implement policies and enact legislation that seriously and radically restricts pollution.

Today Bush resigned, Nader won and Putin lost the elections and all major right wing European parties are doing very badly in the opinion polls.

Today the Pope encouraged people to use condoms.

Today Berlusconi is in prison.

Today proletarian expropriation is recognized as a legal form of civil disobedience.

Today United States won the World Cup in football/soccer thanks to miraculous goals of Freddy Adu and Landon Donovan.

For further indebt analysis of this news please check here.

1 comment:

Srdjan Cvijic said...

Hey Big Lebowski, "Do you know anything about 'Nam...you are entering a world of pain"
Dork